Love Lockdown – Keeping Romance Alive During the Pandemic
It's no surprise that the COVID-19 pandemic has reshaped the way we interact in our personal relationships. Married parents have found themselves juggling work-from-home responsibilities, housekeeping, and working around the clock to help their children navigate online schooling. For those who started the pandemic in the beginning stages of their relationships, they've faced a fork in the road – choosing between moving in together or attempting to keep the spark alive long-distance.
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No matter what situation you resonate with, the abrupt change to our daily lives has put pressure on even the most healthy relationships. So how do we adapt to the new normal while still keeping that spark alive? Every couple communicates differently, so there's no precise answer for navigating the rocky waters of an extraordinary love affair – but there are certain traits that all healthy relationships share, including communication, compromise, honesty, and intimacy. Working on continuously building these traits is crucial, whether you're fresh into your second week of dating or have been together for decades.
One important thing to remember is that we're all in the same boat – but effective communication is the key to any healthy relationship.
When times are hard, it's easy for those intrusive thoughts to swarm in, causing notions of criticism towards yourself and your loved ones. To maintain a healthy relationship, it's essential to keep an open dialogue about the issues and insecurities you're dealing with. Healthy relationships depend on effective communication, so it's essential to set some ground rules for handling conflict with your partner. For example, if you feel that conflict is escalating quickly, it's ideal to call for a time-out and talk about the issue once both parties have had a chance to take a breath and reflect on their emotions. A lot of negativity can arise in the heat of the moment, and saying something that you don't mean can hurt your partner’s feelings and have a negative impact on your emotions. Once the emotional atmosphere has cooled off, consider revisiting the topic with open ears. This means taking an extra effort to truly listen to what your partner has to say and try and put yourself in their shoes. Once you have a better understanding of your partners' needs, you can actively work to ensure that those needs are being met – and vice versa.
Another critical attribute in improving communication skills in a relationship is to reflect on yourself and how you communicate because not everyone is perfect.
Do you find yourself constantly bringing up old issues and past behaviour as a way to put your partner down?
Do you use sarcasm when you’re upset instead of being straightforward and saying what you mean?
Do you bottle up your feelings only to bring them up to your partner when it’s too late?
These behaviours are a very natural default response to conflict, but that doesn’t make them ok. Analyzing how you react to your partner when things get rocky is a crucial step in mastering fundamental communication skills no matter how long you’ve been in a relationship.
Upon setting communication ground rules, it's a good idea to block out a few hours throughout the week to make time for fun activities.
Even during the pandemic, finding something fun to do with your partner is a great way to blow off steam from the week and build upon intimacy skills. Although many activities are currently off-limits because of social distancing measures, there are still creative opportunities to try with your partner.
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Date night ideas if you're cohabiting
Try an online dance class
Physical touch is often regarded as one of the highest forms of intimacy. Signing up for an online dance class will allow you to express creativity and build a stronger emotional connection with your partner. Couples that dance together stay healthy together, and there's no better way to blow off steam from the week than to get moving.
Create a restaurant bucket list
One out-of-the-box idea to try with your partner is to create a list of restaurants to visit and order take-out from. There are so many amazing restaurants in Markham and the GTA just waiting to be discovered, and on top of discovering so many amazing dishes, you're also supporting local businesses, which is crucial for the economy during this time
Cork open a bottle of wine and enjoy some oldies
What better way is there to feel at home with each other than having a movie date night filled with some classic oldies? Re-visiting your favourite movies with your partner can induce a sense of nostalgia, which is extremely comforting during times of uncertainty.
Have a gourmet coffee date
For non-drinkers, opting for a gourmet coffee date is the perfect drink-based activity for coffee aficionados. There are several different ways to brew coffee including the French Press method, the pour-over method, and the Moka pot method. Learning about different grind sizes and which types of coffee pair well with certain foods is a fun and engaging way to step up your coffee game to enjoy perfectly-brewed, gourmet coffee every morning.
Date night ideas for long-distance relationships
Tour world-famous museums in your pyjamas
Escape the crowd of tourists and explore world-renowned museums from the comfort of your own home. Many museums and galleries are offering private virtual tours so you can get your culture on with your partner while discovering some of the worlds’ most coveted art pieces. A few online exhibits to check out: The Van Gogh Museum in Amsterdam, The Louvre in Paris, and the Smithsonian National Museum of Natural History in Washington.
Host a virtual game night
Whether you opt for a BuzzFeed quiz, an online board game, or an adventure game, there are so many great options to choose from that will keep the laughs going and allow you to learn new things about your partner in an experimental manner.
Re-create a concert night
YouTube offers so many full-length concerts for you to re-live your favourite live music experiences. Whether you would like to experience Fleetwood Mac’s full-length 1983 performance at the Los Angeles Forum or opt for something short form, such as John Legend’s 15-minute performance on NPR Music, there is something for every music lover to enjoy.
Relationships are always an ongoing learning experience. Once you’ve established effective communication, intimacy, and honesty skills, you can begin to develop habits every day that will allow for a passionate and healthy connection, even amidst a global pandemic.